That’s the only thing that’s running thru my mind at the moment. And I was in such a good mood before…
Let me rant about this for a while before I recount today and Futsal day for you.
Very well you little prick. Point taken. I shouldn’t have been so quick to judge the fellow seeing as he turned out to be a nice guy and not as creepy as initially assumed. I suppose creepy was a harsh word to use but appropriate at the time.
I’m not going to remind you that I can’t change my upbringing and if it shows in this blog then so be it. As for being a snob, I can’t say it’s the first time I’ve been called that but I damn well won’t apologise for wanting to be treated with respect. If a person directly tells you to stop saying something because it’s creepy, I’d expect some courtesy and hope they at least consider it – no, rephrase. They should bloody well consider it.
I will not, and repeat will not apologise for assumptions made. I write these at the spur of the moment and like hell I care if I do the proper research at the time. You are free to correct me if I’m wrong and I graciously accept that I made a booboo there. Financial or otherwise, I can’t help where I went to school and neither can you. Life’s unfair like that and it’s not like I’ve never wanted to be like a normal kid and got to a normal school. If you can make assumptions about me, then I can damn well make assumptions about you. I am neither rich, nor wealthy. Believe it.
I don’t get the line of reasoning that if a girl has a boyfriend, she’s snobbish. I really don’t follow. Or even the other way around. If she’s a snob, she has a boyfriend? I’d rather think it’s the reverse – if she’s nice, then wouldn’t it be more likely that she’s taken? Yeah. That I don’t get so – feel free to let me know how that works.
And the annoying thing about long comment posts is that I have to keep referring to them. Oh well. For the sake of consistency, I’ll go thru it all.
And the last bit about wanting to learn about culture – I (I can’t say for everyone) hate it when people beat around the bush. That is, if you want to know something, just ask. Don’t be a smart ass about it. If it’s a genuine question, then I’m pretty sure I won’t bite your head off unless I’m in a foul mood of whatever – and I’d tell you if I was.
AND just so that we are clear – I know people from Chinese schools. I do. I really know them. I like these people. They are cool. But the difference is that I know them in person. They are non-threatening beings to me. They have their quirks and I get that. But whatever – being curious about people doesn’t automatically give you the right to ask them personal questions. ESPECIALLY if they have already made it clear that they don’t know who you are. That’s borderline stalker to me. That’s the buggin’ point. And my Chinese school friends? They don’t do that. So it is totally possible from someone from that background to understand boundaries. You see why I find him a little off?
And HELLO. If you haven’t noticed, it’s not that easy to be super-confident all the time. Not like I’m super-confident even half the time. It varies. I don’t think it’s an issue unless it’s low like most of the time. Which is why I blog it out. Blogging clears the head and clarifies all the doubts and niggling thoughts I have. Enables me to function like a normal, confident person.
I try to be humble. Sort of. I forget sometimes. I don’t automatically think I’m the best at what I do, but I figure I’m not too shabby at it. And if I ever make cracks that I am really good at something, then I’m totally joking. No, seriously. Self praise is no praise and I absolutely agree. Although mother-of-mine would say that if you don’t praise yourself, who will. I suppose it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there and sometimes you have to perk yourself up. But I never do it in public. Parents are enough of an ego boost when you really need it. Can’t rely on parents for even that tho – veeeeery unpredictable beings, they are.
I don’t like being emo. But I am. Sometimes. Not often, thank God.
And buddy, if you think I’m arrogant – tell me how and why and I’ll get back to you in 2 working days. In the meantime – bite me. Don’t go criticising my writing and put a lame “no offence” at the end. Dude – read your own post and see if anyone’s going to take offence. If you wrote down your thoughts, feelings and emotions and someone picked it up and laughed at it, wouldn’t you feel offended? I sure as hell do. And at this point, I don’t think an apology would cover it. Too pissed off right now. I may calm down in a day or two.
P.S. And after re-reading, I would just like to say, I have the Godd*mn right to say whatever I want because of the Constitution. It’s called freedom of expression. So whatever assumptions I make are my right and my right alone. Just like you have to right to rebut my assumptions. With proof please, as you are encroaching onto my cyber property. Don’t make me put up one of those annoying disclaimers on this blog.
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Sigh. I don’t like feeling like I have wasted time doing something I thought was important only to later feel like it was a waste. I hope that that wasn’t a waste. Tho, to be fair to myself, I don’t think I could have concentrated with that bouncing around my head.
Ah, what else…
Oh yes, the Futsal for Flood Relief! Friday was awesome. The futsal was fantastic, the refs were awesome, Michelle was close to hyperventilating but it all came together and it was all worth it just to see the finals. Like I said, the futsal was totally ripping! Actually, the semis were better in a sense that there were 2 really good teams – the finalists – and the semis were where they both shone. The finals were rather anti climatic cos one team dominated the whole game. Thought it would be closer.
Lotsa cute guys. I use the term “lots” loosely but I did spot a couple of glance-worthy fellows. Some personal drama, but a little on that later. Loads of people turned up just to watch! So the bleachers were packed and lots of cheering going on – especially from Alpha-Q’s section!
Cheeky name.
AQ consisted of the boys from my L1 class so the girlies were there in full force – gotta support our lads! They didn’t make it past the groups tho.
Oh and about personal drama – not so much drama as, intrigue. I was self-appointed photographer person (alongside Adrian) for the semis onwards. I like Michelle’s newer camera – it’s fast and really clear. Anyway, me was taking pics of the 3rd-4th match warm up. The medic dude of the day comes up to me and tells me one of his friends wants to know me better. O-kaaaaay… I semi-freak (good description of what I went thru in all of 5 seconds) and say ok, glance to where he points and says “next to the goalie”, and I sorta scurry over to Jia who was on the pitch briefing blokes. I cling to him for support (poor guy has to deal with me freaking). Nothing like this ever happens to me. I have no idea how I’m supposed to react. Jia looks over for me and says “he’s ok what.” Ok. So I have at least a second opinion. Would have been better if Jia knew him or what. End part one.
Part two is short. Its pre-finals time and teams are warming up. I’m sitting with scoreboard and people and Jia’s there. I ask him which one’s that one. He points out guy. I consider: ok, not bad. None of them are bad although he’s on the team with James V. That fella, I know (not too well, but I know his bro. Same same, I guess). Oh, I forgot to mention, that the guy the medic dude pointed to was on one of the finals teams. Yeah, and it’s pretty easy to figure out the “team”.
Plus, I’ve been running up and down taking pictures or futsal goings-on so people pretty much know me as photogirl or some variation of that. Especially that team to seem particularly photo-happy.
Part three (Part two’s over. I don’t have to spell it out to you, right?).It’s really pre-finals time, like before they kick-off. And out of the blue, they holler “Photo!” I expect Adrian or some other to run to snap shots, but alas, my name is called and I have to rush off to find a camera after passing mine off to Michelle (I wanted to retire my photographing career – the camera I used before wasn’t good). Kirsty offered to let me take photos with her camera – little Sony action there – but I didn’t really like it and I asked her to take it for me while I try n find Michelle. I run out to find Michelle’s awesome newer camera (Canon, bless your soul) and race back to take photos. Tell se sooner, why don’t you.
Teams line up and I snap away. Dude who was scoping me out was dorky. That’s all I’m saying. I don’t even know if it is really him. An adorable sorta dorky. I’m trying to not get ahead of myself here. He will henceforth be refered to as d’ork – not in a demeaning manner, but it’s easier for me to refer to him later. I do know his name, but no way am I putting it up here. It’s not necessary for the storyline anyway.
So I have formulated a plan of action. Lea knows. I know. Details are to be confirmed. Just one more phone call to make. And we shall see how it pans out.
As for the end result, I’m not expecting much. I’m tentatively leaving in Sept so a fling is max what I expect. Wow, I’ve never had a fling before. Hah. See how I guess.
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I love it when people write nice comments on blogs. On any blog, not just mine. It shows appreciation, and gratitude. I don’t expect comments and when I do, nothing ever comes up anyway. I try to leave nice comments on blogs that I read and that I want the writer to know that I read. It’s a complex system of politics but it works in a sense. The balance is kept and everyone’s happy. I don’t like leaving anonymous comments but I will if I know the writer and I don’t want them to know me. I might unhinge things in a way. To each his own, I guess.
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