Walkies

So I took that walk.

And I feel a lot less... emo.

As a side note, on the way out I encountered my house mate who asked me "where are you going?" to which I replied "out for a walk" to which he laughed and said "oh! So emo!" Wrong. He has since realised the error of his ways and has not amused himself at my moodiness. Although I have to admit, the adjective was appropriate, I hate the word.

A lot less stressed and less cabin-fevered. I would have liked to have walked for longer (I was out only 45 minutes I think) but I couldn't find a quiet, safe spot to walk about town. Alexandra Gardens was cordoned off for the New Years Carnival thing and the City Centre was full of scary drunk yobs.

The Carnival is another sore point. I love going on these rides but it's only truly fun if someone enjoys it with you. No one here, and I stress no one here ever joins me on the rides. Its like living in a black and white library with all the fun sucked out. Where are my buds when I need them? Also sadly, I was thinking that even The Boy would not go on a ride with me. Not even the Big Wheel. What sadness.

Moping over, I'm sitting once again in my brightly lit room feeling a little like a bird in a gilded cage. Even if someone opens the door, will there be anyone on the other side?

Halfway holiday

I got my period yesterday. So I'm definitely feeling extra sensitive and vulnerable and hormonal.

At the moment I'm feeling a little pissed off.

It's a little bit of anger mixed with some frustration aimed at The Boy. It's not all his fault but I need to vent and usually I can vent to him but for the last 3 months, I haven't really been able to and therefore I'm aiming all my daggers in his direction.

My house mate is unaware of the dangerous time bomb sitting 20 metres from him which is why I'm planning to take a short stroll later on to cool off. I've been cooped up too long and leaving the pot to boil is going to burn a hole in the bottom of the kettle.

New Years is coming up soon.

I need some good news to perk me up or I might just grind my teeth to stumps.

It's my I-want-to-punch-something/someone time of the month. Beware, unless you have chocolate or good news.

Christmas Eve Night

Technically it's Christmas morning, but it's not really.

There's no tree.

There are no presents.

There's no family.

This is a sorry excuse for a Christmas if I ever saw one.

I can do without the tree and presents. But I'm home alone. The house mates have gone off to Malaysia and London respectively. The Boy is uncontactable. Family is thousands of miles away and the relatives I have here couldn't give a damn.

I'm normally a jolly kind of person. I can handle work stress, relationship stress even friendship stress. But at this time of year, I'm detached from my loved ones - so far I can't even feel them.

Everyone else is living it up with their Boy or Girl or family. And it feels wretched to not have that at this time of year.

It's not that I don't have friends here. I just don't have people who I'm close enough to here.

I don't need a Christmas miracle, just a Christmas hug.

Christmas Eve 2009

Things to do:

1. Get out of bed
2. Brush teeth
3. Change clothes
4. Contact lenses
5. Go to Tesco Metro and buy floor cleaner and chocolate chips
6. Go to Melody's house at 5.30 with a sieve
7. Go to Bin Hau's for steamboat

I should start getting on that.

* * *

I've also been in heat for the past 2 weeks. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. Severe lack of Boy around I guess.

Period is also late. Not too troubling except the anxious waiting game. Red, no red? Maybe TMI. But hey, that's life.

Merry Christmas Blogosphere!

Winter Holidays

I was supposed to go to France for a nice holiday break but my passport's not back from the Home Office yet. I haven't even had word about biometrics yet. Everyone else I know has at least gotten a letter from them but I haven't. I sent it off thru the Student Support Centre so maybe they;re on holiday now or something but either way it's been over 6 weeks. It takes up to 14 weeks so I have found out. That's insane...

The Boy has gone off to Barca and is going around the south of France with his brother. Should be a good trip. He offered, as a conciliatory Christmas present, to pay for my plane tickets to France so I could spend a few days with him in St-Etienne. I almost cried with joy!

I almost cried with anger when my passport hadn't come back to me by December.

* * *

It's still tough with him in France and with no skype. But things are working out ok. There's still FB (occasionally) and msn. No audio-visual stuff but I call him thru Skype once in a while and I see his pics on FB so I know he's telling the truth when he says he's lost weight. LDR v2 isn't as bad as I thought it might be. It's further, but the principles are the same - you work with what you got.

* * *

Been hanging out with Su-Ann quite a bit. Dunno why - we're in different groups in the BVC and we don't really have the same schedule or study habits but we know each other well enough that we enjoy doing things together. I've been seeing a lot of Kirsty in the library as well. Staying in the Legal Practice Library (LPL) till 9pm every night will force the oddest of friendships. We've got our late night library times in common so that helps the small talk.

Chern's dropped off the radar a bit but has resurfaced come the end of term. She's not as uptight as she used to be but when you have down time in the BVC you can't afford to be stingy with what you want. You don't know when's the next time you'll have down time again! It really is a matter of "my precious..."

* * *

Had a wicked night out on Tuesday after the Opinion Writing exam. 4 hours in City Hall and most of us went ot town to relax or shop or both. It was Lizzy's birthday so we congregated in Lloyd's for lunch. I went home at about 7pm after following Su, Chern and Melody shopping and then out again to 10 Feet Tall and Revolution at night. Melody didn't come out at night tho.

Really a fun night! I didn't get drunk - I had a bit of champagne, courtesy of Wai Cheong but I didn't drink after we went to Revs cos Julie was in a right state. She could barely stagger in, let alone walk. She almost sat in a chair with smashed glass! Azzy was there so she kept an eye out as well.

After Revs Wai Cheong wanted to go to Gala. He always goes to Gala. The only reason I go to Gala is cos of Wai Cheong. I only went the first time cos Jeremy went I think. Either way, WC was there. He played blackjack with Kien Lun and Kenneth T and I tried to show Kirsty how to play roulette. The croupier taught her how eventually. A lot of old Chinese folks in Gala...

Fixing a lamp in Revs

* * *

So The Boy has offered me a delayed Christmas present in the form of a trip to Porto (originally a trip to Greece or Croatia) during Easter. My Easter break is pathetic: 1 week break but the week after I have 2 summative exams - Civil and Criminal. So not much of a break there...

I don't care tho. I can't go anywhere this holidays so I'm bloody well going to take a few days off for Easter. Porto cos there's a direct flight from St-Etienne thru Ryan air.

I really should start planning. I have forgotten to inform/ask the parents about it first but I'm assuming cos they said yes (originally) to the France trip, they will be ok with this one. Still, my mind would be at ease if I had their permission.

* * *

I subscribe to several blogs, a majority of those are by people I know. One such blog is by a girlfriend of a friend of mine. I do know her personally, but since her boyfriend is in my course and I knew him first, that's how I'll always see her. Anyway, they've been steady for ages and ages and if anyone's going to take the leap, it'll be them, but not so soon.

That said, her recent post has irked me to no end. At the end of her most recent post she has HINTED at what she wants in a husband - metaphorical finger pointing at the aforementioned boyfriend.

I have no doubt that they are in love and madly so and they've been together longer than some pairs of socks I have, but the blatancy that she has set out her matrimonial goals pisses me off.

She's amazingly smart and clever and extremely modern but when it comes to family values, she seems to have no clue over and above her little bubble of wedded bliss. Sure, I want a family and a stable one at that, but to smear it all over the blogosphere like a thick coat of rainbow nutella is too much for me. Keep your quasi-proposal pokes private please.